TNA Genesis 2010

Date: 17th January, 2010
Venue: TNA Impact! Zone
City: Orlando, Florida
Attendance: 1,200
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Woo let’s get this show on the road. Your commentators are Taz and as usual, Mike Tenay.

PPV starts with Hulk Hogan and Eric Bischoff coming out into a 4 (FOUR) sided ring!! There is a long ramp coming from the stage that enters the ring at canvas level, just like WCW used to do. Some of the fan’s aren’t happy and chant ‘We Want Six Sides’. Hogan takes a few cheap shots at Vince McMahon saying sports entertainment isn’t real wrestling. Bischoff tells the fan’s to used to change as there is a lot more on the way. “What ya gonna do, Vince McMahon, now that TNA is coming for you!?”. Think it’s going to take a while for some old TNA fans to become happy with the changes these two are making.


X Division Championship
Amazing Red (c) vs ???
Red’s mystery opponent is….BRIAN KENDRICK! Who, incidentally comes out to some kind of violin themed entrance music, which is amongst the worst entrance music I’ve ever heard. This was a fairly subdued X Division match, mostly consisted of submission moves and punches and kicks. Major spots included Red hitting a front Senton dive to the outside and a springboard Code Red to win it.

Not sure what the point is in having Red win here, he hasn’t been on Impact for the past few weeks, and just got a clean win over a debuting superstar. They could have at least had Kendrick lose and feel cheated rather than be pinned after pretty much the first major move done on him.
Winner and STILL X Division Champion, Amazing Red (09:03)
Via Pinfall (Code Red)
**1/4


Hogan and Bischoff are backstage with Hall, Nash and X-Pac/Syxx-Pac/The Kid, whatever the hell his name is here. Hang on, is this really not an old WCW PPV? Huh, oh well, they all take part in some bad acting and Hall and the Kid argue about who will be Nash’s partner tonight. In reality, Hall is too drunk and too fat to compete, and so the Kid wins a game of rock, paper, scissors to take his place.


Sean Morley vs Daniels
Morley comes out to some classic porn music and attacks Brooke Hogan with his sweaty gooch towel. He makes some penis jokes before Daniels comes out to interrupt. Daniels gets a great reception, until he realises he’s meant to be a heel, and insults the crowd. So, Morley is meant to be the face and gets a mixed reception, and Daniels is meant to be a heel and gets cheered. Good work on that one TNA. Probably doesn’t help that Impact Zone fans are morons and just chant moronically like morons all the time.

Daniels dominated most of the match, went for the BME at the end but Morley rolled out the way, clotheslined him down and hit the Money Shot (well, after slipping twice on the top rope trying to set it up)
Winner: Sean Morley (09:10)
Via Pinfall (Money Shot)
**


Women’s Knockout Championship – 2 out of 3 falls match
O.D.B. (c) vs Tara
Urgh, I hate ODB. Fat, ugly mess. The singles matches between these two have been questionable at best, whose idea was it to have a 2 out of 3 falls match?

Not a lot happens to start off, Tara manages to score a roll-up and claim the first fall (02:45). ODB then beats on Tara for over 5 minutes, about 4 of which were in submission holds. Tara then hits the Widow’s Peak out of nowhere and gets the second fall to win the match. I’m pretty sure that was the only move Tara did in the entire second fall.
Winner and NEW Women’s Knockout Champion, Tara (09:35)
Fall 1 via pinfall (Roll-up pin)
Fall 2 via pinfall (Widow’s Peak)
*1/2


Christy Hemme is backstage with the Pope (that’s Dinero, not the dude from the Vatican). Hemme has some fine cleavage going on. I wonder how many penises she could fit in her mouth, I’d have to say at least 3, probably 4. Anyway, I’m getting sidetracked here, Pope is pimpin’. He disses Desmond Wolfe and tells Hemme to get him a sundae as he’s so hot. Yeaaaah.


World Tag Team Championships
The British Invasion (Brutus Magnus & Doug Williams) (c) vs Matt Morgan & Hernandez
Good lord, this might even be a good match, it’s only taken a third of the event.

Match starts off as fairly standard tag team affair. British Invasion use a lot of cheap shots and foul tag-teamery to wear down Hernandez. Hernandez finally hits a big Pumphandle Slam and manages to tag in Morgan who takes down BI and hits the corner elbows on Williams. British Invasion eventually get the match back in their favour and hit an awesome Big Boot/German Suplex combo for a 2 count. Morgan and Hernandez eventually single out Magnus. Hernandez hits a Gutwrench slam that looks eerily similar to Faarooq’s Dominator, before Morgan hits the CARBON FOOTPRINT….and new champions! Decent match, should have been given a lot longer though. Crowd goes nuts. These guys are really popular, they need some awesome team name, like Morgandez or Hernorgan. Or something better.
Winners and NEW World Tag Team Champions, Matt Morgan & Hernandez (08:41)
Morgan pinned Magnus (Carbon Footprint)
**3/4


Bobby Lashley is strutting backstage, he marches into Eric Bischoff’s office where Abyss takes him out for no good reason and knocks him out with a computer monitor, what a bastard. Hogan storms in and says not to worry as Abyss will still have a match later on. Abyss asks who against but Hogan tells him to wait and find out. Ooooh juicy.


Desmond Wolfe vs “The Pope” D’Angelo Dinero
Woooooooooo. That was the sound of a wolf. I’ve never noticed before but Pope’s entrance video consists mainly of boobs. Some money falls from the ceiling and the paupers in the front row start grovelling on the floor for it. Taz claims Wolfe’s escort is experienced with zippers after helping him off with his trousers, classic Taz. Pope then slips a bill into her cleavage and gives her a kiss. Pimpin’.

Side Note: After Wolfe called the fans ‘wankers’, Taz kept repeating the word not knowing what it meant. It always amuses me Americans don’t know this word. Wolfe tweaked his knee early on and so Wolfe went to work on it, locking in some really innovative submission holds. Towards the end Pope began to fight back and hit a few big moves including an awesome elevated DDT and a big Spinebuster Powerbomb. Pope went to end it with the DDE but Wolfe charged out the corner and hit a big lariat for the win. Best match of the night so far, and the first one over 10 minutes. That’s not really a coincidence.
Winner: Desmond Wolfe (13:39)
Via Pinfall (Lariat Clothesline)
***1/4


Jeremy Borash is in the back but gets interrupted by Eric Bischoff, who in nicer words, tells him to fuck off. He replaces Borash with Christy Hemme but they are cut off by Ric Flair. Hemme asks him what his roll is going to be in TNA, but he doesn’t really reply, just jabbers on about being here with all the best talent and then Wooo’s his way off.


The Band (Kevin Nash & Syxx Pac) vs Beer Money, Inc. (Robert Roode & James Storm)
Storm starts off by spitting some beer into Nash’s face. Fairly standard tag match, nothing at all out of the ordinary, Pac looked decent I guess. Towards the end Scott Hall came down to the ring to distract Beer Money, but ended up pulling a fan over the guard rail and beating oh him, distracting Syxx Pac. Meanwhile, Storm hits a Super Kick on Nash and Roode gets the pin.
Winners: Beer Money, Inc. (09:55)
Roode pinned Nash (Storm Super Kick)
**


Nash looks pissed at Hall and Pac after the match, I’m heavily assuming that fan that Hall beat up was a plant. Hogan tells Bischoff backstage he isn’t pleased with the Band and says he’s going to sort them out this Thursday.


Abyss vs ???
So, our second mystery opponent of the evening. Abyss comes out and his opponent is….MISTEEERRRRRRRRR… erm, he doesn’t say but it’s Ken Anderson!!! He says the fans have missed him and he’s missed himself and announces himself as…Mr. Anderson. There ya go.

Pretty dull match in all honesty, these two really didn’t gel well together, and the crowd couldn’t have cared less. God I hate Impact Zone fans. Abyss hit a Chokeslam for a 2 count and then the Shock Treatment for another near fall. Abyss then went mental and got a steel chair, but as he went to use it the ref took it away and Anderson knocked him out with some brass knuckles he had hidden in his trunks.
Winner: Mr. Anderson (10:30)
Via Pinfall (brass knuckle punch)
*3/4


World Heavyweight Championship – Last Chance match
A.J. Styles (c) vs Kurt Angle
Well, it’s been a pretty poor show up to this point. Pressure is on these boys to pull something special out of the bag.

First 10-15 minutes or so were quite slow and methodical, not many signature moves being brought out. Styles eventually hits his trademark dropkick and then a Diving Senton to the outside, and he lands square on top of Angle. Soon after Ric Flair makes his way down to ring side for some reason. Angle now begins to hit his suplexes, he lands a number of German suplexes before Styles comes out with the Pele kick (is that supposed to be named after the footballer, because if so it’s pronounced Pell-ay, not pay-lay.
Styles hits a Hurricanrana and goes to finish it with a Springboard 450!! Misses!!! Angle hits the ANGLE SLAM for…..2!! Angle heads to the top rope for the Moonsault, and that misses as well. Styles goes for the Styles Clash…reversed into the ANGLE LOCK!!! AJ manages to kick Angle off but AJ hits a springboard crossbody for another 2 count. Styles looks to set up a top rope Styles Clash but Angle reverses and ends up hitting a STYLES CLASH off his own (not from the top rope)!! 1…..2…..NO!! A second Angle Slam attempt is reversed into a DDT. Angle misses a charge into the corner and then AJ hits the ANGLE SLAM for 2!! Ooooh, things really heating up now. AJ heads to the top…Angle jumps up quickly, TOP ROPE ANGLE SLAM of DOOOOOOM. 2 count, unbelievable.

Angle pulls the straps down, he means business now, Angle Lock applied in the centre of the ring! AJ attempts to kick off but fails, Angle applies the GRAPE VINE!!!! AJ was about to tap but FLAIR PULLS OUT THE REF. Oooooh interference. AJ taps anyway and Angle looks confused. Angle chases Flair but lures him into a Styles lariat. Flair throws AJ the belt, he thinks about it then WANGS Angle round the face. BOSH! Flair slides Hebner back into the ring for a very slow count, 1…….2………3!! Styles defends. Hebner doesn’t seem to mind much as he raises Styles’ and Flair’s hands.

Good match, not brilliant but very solid. Wasn’t as much of a finisher overkill as the match on Impact a few weeks ago but maybe slightly less exciting. I thought we might get to see the Spiral Tap, but no luck there.
Winner and STILL World Heavyweight Champion, A.J. Styles (28:50)
Via Pinfall (belt shot)
***3/4


Final Thoughts:
Overall, not a very good event, definitely much worse than Turning Point and Final Resolution. Only saving grace here was the main event, but even that could have been a lot better. Some of the booked matches seemed a bit questionable. Where was Samoa Joe? Where was Jeff Hardy? Where was MCMG? Where was Eric Young? What’s happening with the Global championship? Also, TNA really needs to start doing PPV's outside the Impact Zone. The front rows in front of the camera are always filled with goons trying to be funny and thinking they're real wrestling fans. Also the crowd always does the same generic chants. If TNA wants to get some credible heels and faces they need to start moving to arenas where the fans aren't going to be controversial just for the sake of it.

Kendrick and Anderson are good additions to the roster no doubt, but I’m sure some fans will be disappointed after Hogan claimed there would be a major addition that would challenge for the World title. If you haven’t watched the event, it’s probably not worth pursuing, just get a hold of the main event.

6.0 / 10.0

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